Sorry to hear about your mother!
I'm not referring to a time when it was hard in general to be one. I feel like I need to rewrite this with a few disclaimers.

Secondly, anyone who really knows me can tell you I'm not a protector of nice men. Nice men are lethargic. Nice men are a bomb waiting to go off. Good men are present, are leaders, and who put in work without ceasing. Most people know of a couple who've been happily married for 50+ years. That's the illustration I'll always basing from, because why wouldn't I? They tell people of the horror they endured, but both equally worked at it with bloody palms towards the same result. When I say "marriage," I'm referring to the 10% who make it. I tell my clients all the time that most marriages that break up were already broken. Vows without purpose, love, and courage is not marriage, it's a college dorm. Some people think I refer to perfect people, but no one is perfect, we barely meet the dream person our spouse wants, the only thing that matters is if we are quitters. Anyone who is not a quitter will have the sole purpose of doing what is needed for their spouse to be happy and healthy. Anything short is not a spouse. I'm sorry for the confusion of my story. I will work on a rewrite.