Sorry you were put in that position! Glad nothing happened!
Good story!
It is interesting. I have always felt the root issue of sexual assault was pure lack of male development, because I feel a woman's comfort ceasing, the word "no," and other signs and body language of no are always clear to men. It's natural. Men would have to have the common sense of a peanut to not know they were no longer welcome by a woman. Essentially, the moment she disengages with him, I think men know that means she is uninterested in any further exploration and would rather not. He should take the hint and go find someone who is interested. Who wants to be with someone who finds them repulsive?
In addition to male development, I also think another issue is about 20 - 40% or so of the 95% of men who get away with it, literally might not know the Hell & horror it sets in her whole being because she did not fight, just froze. Thus, falsely believe no harm was done. I've known cases like that. I still am curious about his vantage point from this point on, research-wise. Does he think this something okay to do? In case, he did not need to be violent, just simply he believed he was a jackapple who "got off" or was let to. Sadly, I have also heard of women saying they let their attacker get off while holding their emotions in, and waited for the guy to leave. It was a way of not getting killed, they said. Other women I have heard said they relayed the "no," but just like the others did not persuade him past that. So, I agree that men need to know that although they have heard about these two types of assaults, they are still assault and not consented.
So when he is in that situation again, he relates back to the situation of taking what he wanted before and 1) had no consequence and 2) falsely thinking she did not need mental health counseling and that she just shrugged it off, because he did not "hurt" her or act like a violent "Hills Have Eyes Rapist;" thus parted peacefully with no trauma. It is insane to think some men in those situations might actually believe, but I think it is also insane that men would not know when consent is taken back, so I think it is not farfetched. Shitty, yes, but there are always outliers. What this small percentage of men do not know is sexual assault destroys a woman, then we are left with 60 - 80% or so of men were malicious in intent (if the men in this last category would not have took it all the way if she did fight, that is. They still might have). So with teaching men about consent, I think it is also good to let them know that any action against a person's passion is assault. If they did not ask for it, it is a crime. Which, again, I think most men know that and most men are malicious when in those situations. Just as bad as peds, really, by nature. They search, lure, and attack. Lack of pure genuine male development.
- Josh
