Wow. I was so very much impressed. Someone has tied me, with passion. I need to step my game up.
On a serious note - I gave this 50 claps and I'm writing a response. I don't do that unless it spoke to me! I really enjoyed this.
Let me reiterate what the great Niki said, "Don't do it!" Don't talk with him about "it". If his heart was there, you would not need to. YOU NEED SOMEONE WITH SOME FREAKING GRIT, PURPOSE, AND INIATIVE. The best thing to do to assess a person is like what parents to when they are training kids to ride a bike - let go and see if they run back to you because they love you. Or you are arm candy, congrats. As someone who does want a marriage, I don't feel bad, you picked him. Learn the male brain. Unless they pursue your whole person, they just want sex. You not only just wasted your time, but you messed up. Let me make an example. If you and I were talking, and you said you felt we weren't going anywhere because you wanted that dam* investor down the street, okay. Please go. Thanks for not ghosting like an f-ing child, but go. When you break up with him after his awesome trip to Japan *wink-wink* I'm not taking you back. No F-ing way am I #2. You have 1 chance to pick me (if there was guy between me and me). If you just took a break, I'll take you back. But, once you say yes to lunch, breakfast, or a freaking cookie with another guy, have a good life. I want a family and I have some GD incentive. If you have a plan B, if you did not burn the ships, if you did not break the drawbridge, then use your ship and find the next guy who is not good material. Bye, bye. If were were in relationship and you did not fall in love with me, I will help you build your ship back and put you on it. Find someone who would do that and let me know.
As Niki said, walk away from shmucks. When I see you turn down a mother-flubbing boat by some jackapple, then I can trust you. You put your heart first. If you can't, I will walk right on by and not even say "hi". I know that if I get in a car wreck and lose a limb, you're gone even if we are married.
Men are actually simple. You can see right through them, sort of like Niki said.
- He does not text you, you still give him the benefit of the doubt. Texting is the most childish responsibility in relationship. "Hey, I'm at the beach all day, I'll text or call tonight". Good-to-go, okay. Thanks for the adult 101 level communication.
- Much less giving you his heart
- And much less sticking with you through breast cancer. If he can't text you or smoke signal, something, he can't do anything. He's hopeless. You will not fix him. Men will let wives influence them, not someone who texting other men.
Side note: I will say this. If he is in his 30's he might move a little quicker for relationship and that might scare you. Don't ghost him, he might be the guy who would legit stick with you if you lost your head. He just knows what he wants. Every guy knows what he wants. All of a sudden, when a man wants relationship and not sex, he's pushed away as "moving too fast", but sleeping and dipping is good-to-go in your book. Just tell him "Relax. I like you, I can see it working. You're safe. I'm giving you a chance to win me". A good man might move quick when he sees your value. He knows it's a race to win your heart before the next jackapple comes and lies to you and you eat it up. But, you give him a good chunk of time, you will see him slow down and wait for you.
Good job, Niki!
